OK, so those USB OBD2 adaptors are not VAG specific. OBD2 is not VAG specific.
All cars post 1999 are OBD2. Your BMW is OBD2. You need an OBD2 adaptor.
Adding VAGCOM to the search just brings up cheaper USB OBD2 adaptors. They are all the same inside, consisting of a USB RS232 chip and a TH32122 K line (aka OBD2 aka ISO9141) convertor chip.
You will find that you will probably need to short pins 7 & 8, no matter what adaptor you buy. They are all the same inside. Adding BMW to the description adds £20 to the price, but you get the same device.
As for Software, DIS/SSS requires a lot of work to get going. It's based around the GT1 WLAN head (£1000 ish), and requires you to configure a spoof network to trick the SSS into thinking there is a GT1 when you have a USB adaptor.
I've stuck with INPA, it works, has more features than I need, reads and clears error codes. It's not pretty but it's very much not a toy so I don't give two hoots about the looks!